There are people I have never let go
There are people I couldn't let go
I never let her go

Because of her I hate the internet, baseball, alcohol, oxycodone, and every song on the fucking radio
I have come to accept the irrational nature of my thoughts
I have stopped searching for reason in this
I still hold out hope, I refuse to be anything except for naive

In my mind her return is imminent
I await a phone call that more likely than not will never come
I dream of our lips pressed together, of an intimacy that was always fleeting
Of cold nights spent in warm embraces, shared action, shared love

In two months, it will be 1 year straight of thinking of her every day and every night
Just when I think she has gone, she remains
She is five minutes away, but it might as well be Mars

I still believe in her
I still believe in what exists between us
I have fell for another, but she has still yet to leave my mind

She is too deep inside to dig out
I accept her as part of me, as long as my blood continues to flow, and maybe even after.