on being sick

I was really sick yesterday, and probably today to be honest.  I called in sick to work and kept up plans with someone I have recently started to see.  We went to lake anza for a few hours and talked, it was really sweet  Then we came back here and cuddled for a long time and tried to fool around but it hurt my head too much.  It's an interesting relationship.  I have historically had trouble fucking people and also feeling intimacy for them at the same time.  It has happened, I felt it with my ex, but it's been fairly rare that I want an ongoing physical relationship with someone.  Anyways, with this person we make out, cuddle, and basically beat each other up, and it's pretty great.  We both get bruises, mine tend to be worse, and we both understand that sometimes pain can be really nice.  I like being able to explore all different types of relationships, and right now I am super into the hours of making out and cuddling and fighting, it's great.  I am not concerned if it's going anywhere, caz who knows, but I'm just enjoying the moments in this one.

So, back to being sick.  I have really fond memories of being sick from my youth.  My parents in general weren't so great to me and often had a lot of expectations and constant nagging, and then there was the fighting with each other. However, when I was sick they would join forces, take care of me, and be very sweet to me.  I miss that.  I have friends that do that now, and it is sweet too, but it is one of the fonder moments I have from childhood, and there were not many.